(post by BT) Today’s call is from a hard money lender. Definition: hard money is a high-interest, short-term loan for an investment. Caller’s name: Moron! He foreclosed on someone and now has this property, a 6-family building he wants to sell FAST. He does not give exclusive listing, the usual “Just bring a buyer and I will pay you” crap. People say this shit all the time, thinking that if they call every broker in town and offer zero guarantee and no relationship, somehow the property will get sold quick. But when you actually list with a broker, they post the listing for every other broker to see and instantly contact those who may have buyers. No broker will care to bring you buyers because they have no obligation and no guarantee of income from you.

I meet this moronic man to see the property, and he details all the negatives! Violations, bad tenants, evictions. I ask him how much he wants. He tells me he knows it is worth about $700K, as is, but if he tells people $450K, they will offer $250K, so he will not give me any price. “Just have your buyers make an offer.” I tell him I don’t work on these types of “open listings” but if he is willing to take half price, I do have investors who are just a call away. We talk commission and he says he’ll pay 6% - “Work fast to bring me a buyer.” I make a quick call and have an all-cash offer for $450K the next day. I call him and he says “great, fax the offer to me!” This is where he earns his name (Moron). He calls back. “What a shitty offer. And you want me to pay 6% commission?!” “Hold on, you first told me you will listen to any offer, then asked for it in writing when I called with the number.” He says that the offer is too low. I tell him the buyer will probably go up to 500K. “Why did you not send the $500K offer, instead?” I explain that the same way he tries to play and bluff with his “if I tell people $450K, they will offer $250” - a buyer will try to get the best price. Now, it is not OK when others play these same games?! “Look guy, I am doing this for 30 years. You think I need you?”, he shoots back at me. You called me, schmuck! Double standards and talent for wasting people’s time! Why are so many of them such hypocrites and weirdoes, and why did I take a call from this moron?

Was I fooled by him! Sure was… read part 2 to the Hard Money Lender story.